Not T-Rex

This may come as a shock to many people, but there were more dinosaurs than Tyrannosaurus, Triceratops, Stegosaurus, and those long-necked ones (and for goodness sake, pterodactyl was NOT a dinosaur). It’s true. You see, T-Rex was the hot, popular, talented, athletic girl (or guy) of Mesozoic High (their mascot was the Trojan, oddly enough). Everyone knew her and wanted to be her, date her, or burn her (or, him, etc.). But let’s not forget the other cast of characters. Who could forget that super-geek-turned-billionaire-by-30, Troodon. Or that star quarterback who secretly wrote poetry, Lusotitan. Or that super-annoying drama student, Therizinosaurus, who went from hall to hall gesticulating and quoting Mamet. I’m going to end this stupid metaphor now. But the point is, there are a lot of interesting yet relatively unheard-of dinosaurs out there just waiting for a walk-on role in a Spielberg movie. Sorry for that metaphor too.

Below a handful of the other (not T-Rex) big carnivorous dinosaurs;

Carnotaurus: This mid-Cretaceous carnivore grew to 25ft and weighed up to a ton. They were impressive, but also hilarious. You see, Carnotaurus had a short, yet tall head with horns over each eye. They also had stumpy arms…super stumpy arms. Carnotaurus arms make Tyrannosaur arms seem willowy by comparison. Plus their arms were fatter. They were still badass though. I mean, something with a name like “meat-eating bull” is going to be pretty badass.

Carnotaurus

 Allosaurus: I’m a fan of Allosaurus. Good old Al was a big player in the late Jurassic. This 45ft long theropod was widely distributed and is now one of the most well-studied dinosaurs. Allosaurus was smaller than a T-Rex, but still an apex predator. Its three-fingered arms were usable too! Plus it had a ridge-like crest in front of each eye, giving it a dash of exoticism, without the silliness of a flashier feature, like a sail on its back.

Allosaurus

 Acrocanthosaurus: Speaking of things with sails on its back, Acrocanthosaurus was an early Cretaceous predator. I’m glad I wasn’t born in the early Cretaceous, because as soon as I would spot Acrocanthosaurus with its Allosaur-like body and thick fin down its back, I would laugh. Then I would be eaten. I just can’t take the sail-dinos seriously (Spinosaurus and I aren’t talking anymore).

    Acrocanthosaurus

 Megalosaurus: Megalosaurus was the first dinosaur to be discovered and properly (scientifically) studied. Because it was the first, it got the lamest name, which means “big lizard.” Personally, I think that name sucks. Another indignity this big lizard suffered was being the dumping ground of mistakenly-assigned Jurassic bones found in Europe. Fortunately, we haven’t been using this genus as a wastebasket in more recent years. You’re welcome, Megalosaurus. 

Updated Version

Victorian Version

Sexy Studs of Science: Dr. Robert Bakker

When you first see him he looks rugged with his wide-brimmed hat and magnificent grey beard. But look closer. Look into those eyes. You’ll find the soul of the rock-star of paleontology. Men want to have a beer with him and women…want to have a beer with him. His name is Robert Bakker – man, myth, legend – and he kicks ass.

Bakker, paleontologist extraordinaire, along with his mentor, Dr. John Ostrom, sparked the “Dinosaur Renaissance” which continues to this day. He helped popularize the concept that dinosaurs were warm-blooded, that dinosaurs had feathers, found evidence that Allosaurus cared for their young, and worked as an advisor for Jurassic Park. Currently, he is Curator of Paleontology for the Houston Museum of Natural Science. He is also a sexy, sexy man.

Born in New Jersey in 1945, Bakker is no ordinary paleontologist. He is also an artist, writer (he wrote the FANTASTIC novel, Raptor Red), and Christian minister. That’s right; he is a paleontologist and a minister! Personally, I think that makes him magical. He finds no conflict between evolutionary science and faith.  I’m pretty sure he is the offspring of Gandalf and Indiana Jones.

As far as his personal life goes, he has supposedly been married four times. I’m not sure if he is currently married, but if not, hooray! Now sit back and enjoy some photos of the super-sexy scientist!

I love this man.

Even Gorgosaurus loves him. 

  

Just look into those eyes.

Lesser-Known Geniuses

Dolphins and chimps seem to get all the limelight, what with their fancy self-recognition and sign language abilities. But they aren’t the only animals smarter than your toddler, oh no! If dolphins are the NASA spokespeople of the animal world, then the following creatures are the homelier engineers and astrophysicists that do the real work. Please forgive these analogies.

Crows (Corvus brachyrhynchos): These grim-looking eaters of carrion are highly intelligent. Studies have shown that they can identify human faces, use tools to catch food, and learn by observation. Crows in Australia have been able to hunt the poison-skinned cane toads by flipping the amphibians onto their backs and eating their innards. This practice has spread from group to group via observation. It is also thought that crows have episodic memory. So the next time you look into the black eyes of the crow in front of your house, remember that it probably recognizes you.

I'm constantly watching you.

Pigs (Sus scrofa domesticus): These hideous and thoroughly un-kosher beasts are surprisingly intelligent. Pigs crave novelty and love investigating things with their snouts. As pets, they can learn tricks and are often compared to dogs. They can also be trained to hunt truffles, much as a bloodhound is trained to hunt murder victims. So, the next time you eat bacon, remember that you’re eating an animal that is likely smarter than your dog.

Smarter than your dalmatian.

Octopuses (Octopus vulgaris): Yes! The plural of octopus is octopuses and NOT octopi! Now that we know that we can move one. These eight-legged freaks of the deep are super smart, which scares me. They have both long and short-term memory and can learn to navigate mazes. In labs, they can identify different objects and shapes. They also seem to enjoy playing with toys. Unlike any other known invertebrate, octopuses can use tools. In aquariums, they are notorious escape artists. Perhaps the creepiest aspect of octopus intelligence is the fact they learn little from their parents. They just seem to know things.

In my garden, under the sea.

Other smarty-pants animals include; mockingbirds, elephants, and rats. Hooray!

Inbreeding, its a Bad Thing

The above statement may seem obvious enough, but many animal breeders practice it with alarming frequency. The topic of inbreeding (or “linebreeding” if the baby turns out okay) has been on my mind for a while now. I know it was utilized to “fix” desirable traits in many registered purebred horses, but I didn’t really ponder the frequency of inbreeding until recently. And it’s not just horses. The family tree of most purebred dogs is now a bush. A tiny, tiny bush. The BBC documentary, “Pedigree Dogs Exposed,” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJQdYG2WHoE&feature=related) really opened my eyes to the problems of severe inbreeding in dogs. These problems include; bone and joint disorders (German Shepherds, Golden Retrievers, Great Danes, many more), obsessive compulsive disorder (Dobermans), epilepsy (Boxers and others),  Mitral valve dysplasia (King Charles Spaniels), brachycephalic airway obstruction syndrome (Boston Terriers, Pugs, Pekingese), deafness (Dalmatians), Dermoid sinus (Rhodesian Ridgebacks), and many types of cancer. Wonderful. An article in this month’s National Geographic Magazine about dog traits proved to be quite illuminating. Discussing genetic disease, the article states that “because dogs have been genetically segregated into breeds developed from just a few original individuals, each breed has a much smaller set of errant genes – often only one or two – underlying the disease.” The article continues by stating “the possibilities are especially abundant for cancer, certain types of which can show up as often as 60 percent of the time in some dog breeds but only once in every 10,000 humans.” A 60 percent cancer rate? That is CRAZY! Can’t we do some outcrossing here to improve the health of dogs? Will the world end if we cross our German Shepherds with a few Belgian Malinois to boost genetic diversity? I admit, I am not a dog person, so I’ll leave it up to the dog fans to figure out what sort of breeds should be “genetically expanded” with what.

A German Shepherd show dog. Look at those back legs.

What the German Shepherd used to look like. 

Back to horses. My favorite breed, the Arabian, exhibits lots of “linebreeding” in certain horse families. Egyptian Arabians are particularly linebred. Trying to find an Egyptian Arabian without Nazeer (a popular stallion who produced other popular stallions) in its pedigree is like trying to find a skinny person in Houston – they exist, but just barely. Most linebred horses turn out fine. Others are not so lucky. SCIDS (severe combined immune deficiency disorder) crops up from time to time within the Arabian breed, as does CA (Cerebellar Abiotrophy). Now, disease and disorders will exist up in any group of animals, but inbreeding tends to increase the frequency of problems. If a mare has X disorder and is bred to an unrelated stallion without the disorder, the baby may be healthy (depending on the disorder). But if we breed that same mare with her grandfather who also happens to be a carrier of X, then the resulting foal is more likely to inherit the disease. This is an oversimplification, of course. Determining the likelihood of disorders depends upon many more variables.

Nazeer, the "Father Abraham" of Egyptian Arabians.

Let’s turn to Quarter Horses now. HERDA (Hereditary Equine Regional Dermal Asthenia) is a disease that affects this breed (and related breeds). This disease causes the skin to separate between the superficial and deep dermal layers…which means the skin stretches and sloughs off! That is nasty. The disease is caused by a homozygous recessive gene that has been traced back to ONE stallion, Poco Bueno. A horse must have two copies of the gene in order to express the horrifying skin condition. Another genetic horror story that plagues Quarter Horses is HYPP (Hyperkalemic periodic paralysis). This condition is similar to epilepsy and can be traced to another popular stallion, Impressive. This condition is dominant, so even one copy of the gene will cause symptoms. Apparently, HYPP occurs in one in fifty Quarter Horses. All of these horses can be traced back to the same stallion. Fortunately for Quarter Horses, they are the most popular breed in the world and have numbers on their side. It should be fairly easy to find outcross pedigrees to breed with. Egyptian Arabians aren’t so lucky. I’m glad Nazeer didn’t carry any of these diseases or the Egyptian Arabian would be in hot water.

Boco Bueno

Impressive

Are there solutions to these genetic problems? An obvious answer is outcrossing. Simply breed more non-related or super-distantly related individuals. Horse and dog breeders should also utilize the wonders of modern science and get their breeding stock tested for genetic disorders. All of the above-mentioned horse disorders can be discovered through DNA testing. Testing animals will cost a little bit more money, but the health of the animal is worth it. Plus, no one said horse breeding was a cheap hobby.  Rant over…for now.

“You Look Delicious” –any cat

The domesticated housecat may seem innocuous, but deep inside that feline brain lurks an opportunistic genius. This is part of the reason why I love cats. Don’t get me wrong, dogs are nice, but I want a pet that isn’t afraid of eating my corpse if I die inside the house. And that’s exactly what a housecat would do.  Of course, this is a broad generalization. Some cats are sweet little angels that would mourn the loss of their human forever while others, including my cat, will get hungry if their human is still for more than a minute.

The cat’s pragmatic nature probably explains why they are the most popular pet in the world (also, their small size makes them easier to hoard). It is believed that cats domesticated humans at least 9,500 years ago in the Fertile Crescent or Egypt. The African wildcat, or Felis silvestris lybica, is believed to be the ancestor of today’s housecat. Unlike the easily manipulated dog, cats have not undergone much physical or behavioral change after 9,000 years of human tinkering. Aside from a few color and coat changes, the housecat still looks (and acts) remarkably like its wild counterpart. Currently, there are two main theories as to how the cat left the wild and ended up in our house. Some believe that humans actively selected cats to hunt vermin. Others believe that humans gradually accepted the presence of cats as the felines hunted vermin in the increasingly infested human habitations. In other words, the relationship was symbiotic. I tend to agree with the latter theory. After all, who would actively try to “train” a cat to do anything? Cats don’t care what you want them to do. As Eric Cartman would say, they do what they want.

Fun Fact: Cats walk with a “pacing” gate. This means the legs on the same side of the body move at the same time. Camels and giraffe do this too. So do many standardbred harness horses.

Housecats have learned many new traits during their time with humans. They are much more vocal than their wild counterparts, exhibiting a wide range of vocalizations. A simple “meow” means “please feed me,” while a longer “meeeoowww” means either, “feed me now,” “it’s been literally minutes since I was last fed,” or “I’m in heat.” Some cats will make short “eep” sounds. These sounds roughly translate to “food?” A growl means “get the f*** back!” and a purr indicates happiness at having been fed. If a cat swishes its tail back and forth while making short “ack ack ack” noises, it probably wants to kill and devour something. Remove any delicious babies from the vicinity if the cat starts exhibiting this behavior.   

Cats have played an important part in human mythology. The Egyptian goddess Bast is associated with felines, and is often depicted in cat form. Freyja, a Norse goddess, is also a “cat person.” In fact, her chariot is pulled by cats, which is hilarious. Even the Islamic prophet Muhammad was a fan of cats. His favorite cat was named Muezza. So let’s all love cats, shall we?

The cat depicted above is Lady Toes, Oracle of Irvine, Queen of the Galaxy, Commander of Fear, Keeper of Secrets Under the Mountain, Grand Poobah of Existence. Gaze in awe at her magnificence. 

La Brea Tar Pits: the Happiest Place on Earth!

It may be hard to believe, but I was a rather odd child growing up. Instead of going to amusement parks and vapid moving-picture shows, I was taken by my father to museums. One of my favorites was the Page Museum at the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles. I still love that place and look fondly back on those wondrous and mystical outings. I remember the shine of the sun reflecting off of the tar, the plucky bubbles constantly forming on the black surface water, the fiberglass mammoth sinking to its artistically-rendered death as its mate and baby watch from the shore. Ah, the fond memories of childhood! I used to wish that all of Los Angeles could be a vast Pleistocene plane dotted with gleaming pits of tar. Actually, that is still my wish.

For those of you wishing to experience joy and excitement for yourselves, I suggest you pay Rancho de la Brea a visit. The park is nice, but the tar pits are nicer! Pit 91 is especially interesting as it is the only one being actively excavated. It’s basically a treasure trove of awesome. Occasionally, new bubbles of tar will emerge from under the parking lot or lawn. They are usually marked off with an orange cone. If you see one, be sure to point at it and giggle.  

The Page Museum is the (mostly underground) building where the fossils are sorted, cleaned, mounted and displayed. It is a small but abundant museum complete with extinct bison, smilodon, camel, prehistoric horses, a colombian mammoth, and a TON of dire wolf skulls. Seriously, if dire wolf skulls were currency, the Page Museum would never have to ask for donations.

So now that you know this place exists, drop everything you are doing and go visit it! I assure you, it is magical. 

 

Red Bucket Equine Rescue

This is a random post, but Red Bucket Equine Rescue is being forced to leave the Huntington Central Park Equestrian Center. There will be a story about their situation tonight at 10pm (Pacific) on Fox News (it may just be local news, not sure). Red Bucket is a great non-profit. They save and rehabilitate neglected and abused horses and then try to find them homes. Their adoption policy is very strict, which is good, and they do background/facility checks. You can read more about their situation here: http://redbucketrescue.org/media/rescued-horses-given-30-days-to-leave-h-b-home/

If you have some spare change lying around waiting to be given to a good cause, Red Bucket would appreciate any donations. Consider donating your monthly Starbucks allowance.

I will be back to "regular" posting soon.